Here's a question: Do you think the way you look on the outside is a true reflection of your personality on the inside? Does the shape of your body, your hairstyle/colour, the way you dress really communicate to others who you really are? For me the answer's no and from what I can remember, it's always been no. I was "blessed" with white blond hair. Starting from my early childhood this got me A LOT of unwanted attention from everyone. Pats on the head and the like from the elderly and well meaning complementors, through to the vulgar advances from foolish boys and jealous taunts from bitchy girls. Mostly, I just felt like a freak. My mother would laugh that she could spot me easily when picking me up from school. I was the glowing light bobbing amongst the mainly dark faces.
There is so much to say on this subject it overwhelms me. Just thinking of what to write here stirs up the waters. Since my teen years I have shaved my hair off, dyed it bright red, orange and other variations, made it stripey like raspberry ripple ice-cream, cut it all off again, made it spike out, grown it back, had dramatic fringes, had blond dreadlocks, dyed my dreadlocks red, cut them off, short hair again, dyed patches black....The list goes on...
Often, I have felt like a redhead trapped in a blonde's body.
This has lead to self sabotage.
I am now on the journey to (re)empowering the real ME.
Blogging this shit maybe part of it.