Dear person who betrayed me,
I miss you. Well, not really you. I miss the person I thought you were. I loved you. Really cared for you. I thought you knew that. I don't think you know much at all anymore.
I know I said I had forgiven you. On a certain level I meant it. I longed for things to go back to the way they were so in my swirling grief I reached back to you and offered my forgiveness. I wanted to forgive you so badly. However, wishing forgiveness into immediate fruition does not necessarily birth it into reality. The reality is I do not forgive you yet. However, I am working towards it.
But just so you know, for now, my anger is only one arm's length away from connecting with your face.
Yours in the honest process of forgiveness,
Lauren.
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